Who Woulda Thunk It? (Note the Sarcasm)

There are times in the life of every member of a minority group when you take a breath, let it out, take a breath again, and then scream. Trust me, it's better than curling up on the floor and crying, which is what many of us in the Utah Queer* Community wanted to do this morning.

Being Queer in Salt Lake is a strange, wonderful, beautiful, twistedly hypocritical life. On the one hand, Salt Lake itself is an amazingly progressive city, dedicated to conservation, recycling, equality, and beauty. But when you get outside of those few square blocks, it's like stepping into a minefield where one block is safe and secure and the next you can be shot down for even seeming to be gay. There is no denying that the Church of Latter Day Saints has an influence in local politics - most Christian religious groups tend to be socially conservative and drag their feet on everything from womens rights and racial equality to yes, rights for their Queer congregations. In Utah, it means continually being slapped down and around. The State of Utah is one of twenty-six states that has passed a constitutional amendment defining marriage only as a legal relationship between a man and a woman (and this does exclude the concept of heterosexual common-law marriage as well.) In the state of Utah, it is possible to be fired from a job or evicted from an apartment simply because one is perceived as being gay. No proof is even needed.

In a bold move, Equality Utah stepped up to try and change this, and has been shot down so far at every turn. Public comments such as "It's not about gay or straight, it's about protecting the family" echo through the chambers on Capitol Hill. In a simple sentence, Queer families are rejected outright. Not just life-partners who are dedicated to each other, but their children, and children (like myself) who care for family members. Is the assistance to my mother lessened then because I am an individual who identifies as a bisexual?

In truth, the reticence about allowing Queer individuals the same rights as everyone else is about fear. This is nothing new. Everyone knows it. No one I know, conservative or liberal, thinks it is right to allow someone to be fired simply for being perceived as gay. Yet, the rhetoric on the Hill is about how allowing equality will just be the beginning of the end of humanity as we know it. Yes, it will be the beginning of the end. Breaking down walls and allowing conversation does change the fabric of society. In a good way. Equality has never harmed a society and if you don't believe me, go back to 1776 when we told England to very kindly get off our backs. Did the Founding Fathers define equality then as we do now? No. But they did it within the context of the time that they lived and in doing so, gave us the power to keep redefining the nature of the word. The words "All men are created equal" mean so much more to us now than they did back then. The words remain the same but with each wall that is scaled, each group that takes those words and makes them into the powerful doctrine that they are, this country grows stronger. The words remain the same because they are powerful and meaningful. It is up to us to define them.

There is an old joke - that the gay agenda is really three things: wake up, buy milk, don't get killed. It would be funnier if Queer Americans didn't actually have to live in fear of being fired or being evicted. It's been over ten years since Matthew Shepard was beaten to death in Laramie, Wyoming. Do men like Chris Buttars believe that he deserved what happened to him? That he, a sweet kid trying to get his education, was deserving of the treatment he received? For a man (Chris Buttars) who is capable of so much good, who works to keep the drug courts and rehab facilities open because he thinks it is the right thing to do, how can he look at an entire group of citizens and tell us that we are, truly, worthless? He has done good in his career. Just this past week, he fought to keep rehab facilities funded that would have otherwise been cut and thereby cut off needed services to those recovering from substance abuse. He isn't completely evil or cold hearted, but he is blind when it comes to truly seeing people who do not identify with his way of life. Tell me, Senator, what would have happened to the LDS Church and the territory of Utah if there hadn't, at some point, been a compromise with the US Government. After all, the US Government didn't think the Mormons were any more deserving of rights than you seem to think the Queer community is.

I love this state. My heart is here, in this corner of the West. But it saddens me to know that even though I pay taxes, help with my family, respect others, work in my community, help others, and even cheer loudly for my Utah Jazz, that I am still not a fully respected citizen.

*Queer is a personal preference of mine and in no way reflects how others might use or see the term. Please take no offense - gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, queer, queer-questioning, we are all part of the same community.

For information on Chris Buttars most recent comments about the Queer Community, click the links below:

http://www.abc4.com/content/news/state/story/EXCLUSIVE-Senator-Buttars-compares-some-gays-to/5k4Qh7clXUqlXFxVM2bCxA.cspx

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HP2MW9ummi8